A few years ago, I made an appointment with a new doctor to get my thyroid checked. I had been experiencing major hair loss, weight gain despite regular movement and eating well, and a deepening depression that didn’t feel like just a “bad day” cycle. I was nervous going in, but also hopeful. I wanted answers. I wanted to feel like someone was finally going to take me seriously.
What I got instead left me stunned.
The doctor was polite enough, at least at first. I asked for a full thyroid panel; not just T3 and T4, but also TSH and the deeper markers that give a more complete picture. She resisted, preferring the basic panel, but I pushed. I needed the data.
Then came the whiplash.
I mentioned that I cook most of my meals at home and eat a lot of vegetables. Her response? She pivoted immediately to suggesting bariatric surgery.
No blood work results yet. No deeper inquiry into my symptoms. No questions about my mental health history or stress load. Just a fast leap from “try more vegetables” to “maybe you should consider gastric bypass.”
To be clear: I have no judgment for anyone who chooses weight loss surgery. But for a doctor to meet me, hear so little, and immediately jump to a life-altering surgical solution? That’s not just inappropriate, it’s dangerous.
Then she told me, casually and confidently, that my depression would probably go away once I lost weight.
As if my mental health struggles weren’t real.
As if they were simply a side effect of not liking how I looked.
As if this wasn’t a complex, layered human experience.
In that moment, my chest tightened. I pulled my head back in disbelief. I remember blinking hard, my mind spinning as I tried to process what was happening.
But I pushed back.
As an acupuncturist and someone who works in health and healing, I believe in starting with the most conservative and least invasive strategies. I wasn’t looking for a quick fix. I was looking for insight. Instead, I got a projection of bias disguised as care.
What scared me most wasn’t even what she said to me, it was imagining her saying it to someone else. Someone who didn’t have the background I do. Someone who wasn’t practiced in self-advocacy. Someone who might have left that office thinking they were broken, beyond repair, and that surgery was their only path to being taken seriously.
That experience is why I created my 5 Scripts for Self-Advocacy with Healthcare Providers.
It’s a free guide filled with clear, direct language you can use when a provider dismisses you, rushes you, or makes assumptions about your care.
Not everyone knows what to say in those high-pressure moments. These scripts are a starting point ~ not to make you perform, but to help you feel equipped, rooted, and sovereign.
You don’t have to agree with every suggestion. You don’t have to explain your worth.
You get to take up space in the exam room.
Get more info and download the free guide here → 5 Scripts for Self-Advocacy with Healthcare Providers
